Discovering Who I Am » Life Mapping http://www.discoveringwhoiam.com Exploring Faith and Identity Sat, 29 Jan 2011 19:27:22 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.1.2 The Identity Puzzle http://www.discoveringwhoiam.com/2008/07/25/the-identity-puzzle/ http://www.discoveringwhoiam.com/2008/07/25/the-identity-puzzle/#comments Fri, 25 Jul 2008 16:19:55 +0000 evan http://www.evandavis.name/?p=94 I had the privilege of serving Dr. John Trent by putting together the video series of his Life Mapping seminar. In this seminar, Dr. John Trent helps you to map out a course for your life and get you to your destination. The seminar (and the book upon which it is based) involves taking a revealing review of the events and patterns in your past in order to develop a “storyboard” of where you’ve been, where you are, and where you’re heading. In the opening session, Dr. Trent holds up a thousand-piece puzzle box and suggests that our lives are much like a complex puzzle with all sorts of defining experiences and events fitting together to make up the whole. He then asks the question, how difficult would it be to put this puzzle together without the picture on the front of the box?

I agree that life is much like a puzzle with each piece being a component of our identity as a whole. Some pieces are our natural, God-given personality, temperament, desires and passions. Others are defining experiences that have reinforced God’s designs. Some of the pieces make up our worldview on faith, politics, relationship; determining our values and how we might react to any given life circumstance. And throughout our life, we are assembling this puzzle. But I would like to suggest an addition to this analogy: What if there were hundreds of puzzle pieces that had been added to our box that looked very similar in color and design but did not go with our personal puzzle? And what if we didn’t have the picture on the front of the box to go by?

Every day, you and I are assembling our identity puzzle; searching for who we are. I often find myself questioning some of the puzzle pieces I find in my box. Is that piece really me, or did that come out of the “peer pressure” puzzle box, or the “institutional religion” box, or the “that’s how we do it in our family” box, or the “keeping up with the Joneses” puzzle box? I continue to try to force these pieces into my life puzzle despite the fact that they have never really fit and have caused me a lot of discomfort trying to make them fit. Whenever I am working with that particular piece, trying to fit it here or there, I lose my peace and find myself reacting with uncharacteristic anger and emotion. Yet, I did find the piece in my box, didn’t I?

Many of these pieces, I have found to be deeply established, false identity messages that came from wrong conclusions I have made about myself and about God after I was wronged by someone, or was hurt physically or emotionally. Others, upon examination, I realize got into my box at times I chose to chase the success illusion and allowed jealousy and striving in. Some pieces I recognized as left-overs from an unhealthy relationship with a past girlfriend or college party buddy, or foul-mouthed co-worker. I’ve had to toss out a lot of pieces from past life patterns of pornography addiction and people-pleasing and works-righteousness.

The big question I find myself asking is, “How long am I going to continue forcing pieces into my identity puzzle that just aren’t me?” Oh, and by the way, I did find the picture from the front of my box. God had it safely tucked away for me between the pages of my Bible.

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